Tender Mercies

A year ago if someone asked me to explain what a tender mercy was I would have had a hard time doing so. I don't know that I even knew for sure what it was. Recently I read an article that described so well what I felt and was having a hard time putting into words. I share with you parts of this article.

"I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Often, the Lord's timing of His tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge them."

"The Lord's tender mercies are the very personal and individualized blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindnesses, consolation, support and spiritual gifts which we receive from and because of and through the Lord Jesus Christ."

Read that last paragraph very slowly, pausing on each of the words. Let it sink it.

"For instance, as you and I face challenges and tests in our lives, the gift of faith, and an appropriate sense of personal confidence that reaches beyond our own capacity are two examples of the tender mercies of the Lord."

"When words cannot provide the solace we need or express the joy we feel, .....when it seems that perhaps we are so totally alone, truly we are blessed by the tender mercies of the Lord and made mighty even unto the power of deliverance."
The article was in April 2005 Ensign, talk by David A. Bednar.

I look back over the past year and for most of the year, I can see tender mercies in my life on a daily basis. Taking time to reflect over your day, give credit where credit is due. Dave and I were talking today and I told him, in my life the words, lucky and coincidence do not apply. I know the source. I acknowledge the source. The longer I am alive after this transplant and the more I am learning about the disease and treatment, the more fully aware I am of the depth of my miracle.

In articles sent to me from the national online support group, written by physicians from Mayo clinic and Boston University, the two most expert facilities for Amyloidosis; I have read that patients having heart involvement, 25% of them, do not live beyond 3 months after transplant. Mortality is very common by 6 months after. Alot of the online friends with Amyloidosis involving heart that have survived have internal defibrillators or have had heart transplants. I had heart, kidney, liver, nerve and bone involvement. Lethal heart rhythms are what kill the heart involved patients. I did wear a heart event monitor for a month and my heart rhythm is being controlled by 1 little pill taken regularly. My heart ejection fraction (fancy word for how my heart pumps) is normal!! I do have a very impressive heart murmur because of the amyloid. I realize also that the murmur showed up over 2 years ago. As aggressive as amyloidosis is, I should have died from heart failure long before now.

I am learning about even more tender mercies that I wasn't even aware of. I would encourage all of us to take time and think of the daily protection, daily food, daily strength. faith to continue on, ...every little thing and give thanks. I am so grateful for energy. I had enough energy to bake sugar cookies. Roll them out and cut them in the letter A. Then I frosted them too. All in one day! That is the most I have accomplished in one day since Jan of last year. Today I delivered them to all the internal medicine and family practice and GI doctors in the area reminding them of the inservice that is happening next week at the hospital. My oncologist, Dr. Petersen is coming to speak to them about Amyloidosis. I am so thrilled. Maybe even one person will be diagnosed early and their life spared. I truly believe that this is part of why I am still here. That and as always to proclaim that the Lord knows each one of us personally. He loves each one of us more than we can ever know. He is there for us. We are His children. He did grant me my miracle through His power.